Cultivating Joy: What Makes You Feel Alive?

When I was growing up, I thought everyone thought like I did.  I thought everyone saw things the way I saw, they liked the things that I liked, and felt the way that I felt.  

Upon reaching adulthood, what I realized is most people don’t think, see, like, or feel the way I do, and NOBODY does all four of those things.  I am unique, I have skills and talents and experiences that come together in a way that is different from everybody else on earth.  Because of this, what I have to offer is something that nobody else can offer—even if they’re doing the exact same thing as me, they will do it in their own way which is different from mine.

Often the thing we are destined to do is the thing that we enjoy and are good at, that comes so easily to us and seems so obvious that we feel like it couldn’t possibly be that easy.  We are taught that we have to work hard and strive for greatness in something we are not naturally gifted and talented at.  We have to overcome our shortcomings and become someone different than we were born as.

This is simply not true.  It is allowed to be that easy.

To be more authentically ourselves, we have to make time to do more of the things that light us up and make us feel alive.  In the flip side, we have to do LESS of the things that don’t really bring us enjoyment and that we do because we feel like we’re supposed to or because our friends are or because someone else expects us to.

Feeling alive is more than just being awake or going through the motions of daily life. It’s a sense of energy, passion, and purpose that lights you up from within.

For some, it’s climbing a mountain or dancing to their favorite song. For others, it’s creating art, spending time with loved ones, or feeling the sun on their face.

But here’s the thing—many of us lose touch with these moments because we’re caught up in obligations, routines, or even doubts about what truly brings us joy. Today, we’re going to reconnect with that spark.

When you know what makes you feel alive, you’re better equipped to prioritize your passions and live with intention.

Living this way not only enhances your happiness but also inspires those around you. When you’re thriving, your energy is contagious.

So, what brings you joy? Think of those moments when you feel light, free, and deeply connected to yourself. Maybe it’s the sound of waves crashing on the shore, a deep conversation with a close friend, or the way you lose track of time when you’re painting, writing, or cooking. These aren’t just hobbies or fleeting distractions—they’re clues. They’re breadcrumbs leading you back to the essence of who you are.

Take a moment to reflect. Journal about it. Write down everything that comes to mind. Don’t censor yourself or overthink it. Just let it flow. The more you notice what lights you up, the more you can intentionally invite those things into your life.

What activities, people, or environments bring you happiness? What feels easy, natural, and fulfilling? When was the last time you felt completely in the moment, as though time didn’t exist?

That’s the flow state—the sweet spot where you’re fully engaged in what you’re doing, and it feels effortless. Those moments are not random; they’re pointing you toward what aligns with your truest self.

On the flip side, it’s just as important to identify what doesn’t bring you joy. What feels heavy, draining, or misaligned? Are there habits, relationships, or obligations that consistently leave you feeling depleted? Recognizing these patterns isn’t about judgment—it’s about awareness.

What things do you do on a regular basis that feel heavy, draining, or misaligned?

Sometimes, we cling to things that no longer serve us because they’re familiar. Maybe you’re staying in a relationship that feels stagnant, or you’re saying yes to commitments out of guilt or obligation. Maybe you hang out with friends that have no goals or ambitions, who make the same mistakes over and over again, who are bad influences and don't support you wanting more out of life. Maybe you’re stuck in habits that don’t support the person you’re trying to become. These things don’t make you a bad person—they’re just not your path.

Pay attention to how you feel when you engage with different activities or people. Do you feel energized and uplifted, or do you feel like you’re carrying a weight? Your emotions are data. They’re guiding you, if you’re willing to listen.

Imagine the best day of your life—not a vacation, not some distant dream, but a regular day where you feel amazing. What does that look like? What habits, routines, and rituals create a foundation for your happiness?

Is it starting the morning with a cup of coffee and a quiet moment to journal? Is it taking an hour for yoga or a walk outside? Is it spending time on a creative project that lights you up? Maybe it’s something as simple as cooking dinner with your favorite music playing in the background. These small, intentional choices add up. They create the structure for a life that feels alive, rather than one you’re just enduring.

Write down the elements of your best day. Get specific. Then ask yourself: How can I make more days like this? What small shifts can I make today to bring my life closer to this vision?

Here’s the revolutionary part: you don’t need permission to build a life that feels good. You don’t have to justify why you love what you love, or explain to anyone why you’re drawn to certain things. Your joy is reason enough. When you start prioritizing the things that make you feel alive, you’ll notice something incredible—the more you lean into those moments, the more they multiply.

This doesn’t mean life will always feel easy or perfect. Challenges will come, and not every day will feel magical. But when you anchor your life in what makes you feel alive, you’ll have the energy and resilience to face those challenges. You’ll approach life with curiosity and openness, knowing you’re living in alignment with your authentic self.

To create space for what lights you up, you have to let go of what doesn’t. This can be hard—it might mean setting boundaries, saying no to things that don’t align, or letting go of relationships that drain you. But remember: every time you say no to what doesn’t serve you, you’re saying yes to yourself.

You’re choosing to honor your energy and your time, to protect the things that make your life feel full and meaningful. That’s not selfish—it’s necessary. It’s how you make room for the life you deserve.

Living a life that feels alive requires courage. It means listening to your inner voice, even when the world around you is loud. It means trusting that what feels good to you is enough, even if it doesn’t make sense to anyone else. It means showing up for yourself—not just in the big moments, but in the small, quiet ones where you choose joy over obligation, passion over fear, and love over doubt.

So, what makes you feel alive? What brings you joy, ease, and flow? What habits and routines help you build your best day? And just as importantly, what drains you? What do you need to let go of to make room for more of what you love?

Spend some time reflecting on these questions. Write them down. Revisit them often. And as you move through life, let them guide you. Because the truth is, you’re not here to simply exist—you’re here to live. To feel alive. To create a life that feels as good as it looks.

When you align your life with what makes you feel alive, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving. You’re becoming the fullest, most vibrant version of yourself. And that, my friend, is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and the world.