Mindset Matters: Choose the Lens Through Which You See the World
- Kristi Miller
- Jan 24
- 4 min read
Maintaining a positive attitude is the key to living a happy and fulfilled life.
Your mindset is the lens through which you experience the world—it shapes your thoughts, influences your actions, and ultimately determines your outcomes. A growth mindset, coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, is the belief that your abilities, intelligence, and talents can be developed through effort, learning, and persistence. With this mindset, challenges become opportunities, failures are seen as lessons, and setbacks fuel resilience rather than defeat.
She has a fantastic book titled Mindset that I highly recommend you read.
Equally important is cultivating a positive mindset—not about ignoring difficulties, but about choosing to focus on possibilities rather than problems. A positive mindset fosters gratitude, creativity, and hope, helping you navigate life’s ups and downs with grace and confidence.
Studies show that individuals with growth and positive mindsets are more likely to achieve their goals, maintain better mental health, and build stronger relationships. By shifting how you think about challenges and possibilities, you can unlock your potential, embrace change, and create a life of fulfillment and success.
Your mindset isn’t fixed—it’s a choice. Every day is a chance to rewrite your narrative, lean into growth, and see life through a brighter, more empowering lens.
Someone with a negative attitude can ruin even the happiest of experiences by always seeing the bad side of things, robbing themselves of the enjoyment of life on the grounds of being “realistic” or “practical.”
On the flip side, someone with a positive attitude can make even the most tragic or painful experiences just a little bit more enjoyable by offering a watery-eyed smile, a hug, comforting words and in appropriate circumstances, comic relief.
Your mindset dictates your experience.
The good news is, is that you are able to change your mindset if you choose.
Humans are designed to learn and grow and adapt. When you learn new information, you can challenge your old beliefs and make a change. Then your new beliefs, when practiced and kept at the forefront of your mind, will become your new reality.
No matter what age you’re at, how you were brought up, or the circumstances you are currently experiencing—you can change your mindset and use it as a tool to change your life.
Think about a recent challenge or a negative thought you’ve had about yourself. How did it shape your experience? Now, imagine reframing that thought with a growth mindset. If you caught yourself thinking, I’m not good at this, try reframing it to, I’m learning, and I can improve. The simple act of rewriting that narrative shifts your energy and opens up new possibilities.
This isn’t about toxic positivity or pretending everything is perfect. It’s about taking ownership of your perspective and deciding how you want to show up in the world.
The Big Leap: Expand your capacity for happiness
The Upper Limit Problem, as coined by Gay Hendricks in his book The Big Leap, refers to the self-imposed barriers that prevent us from experiencing sustained levels of happiness, success, or love. It’s the phenomenon where we unconsciously sabotage ourselves when things are going exceptionally well, bringing us back down to a level of comfort and familiarity.
Hendricks explains that everyone has an internal "thermostat" for how much joy, abundance, and success they feel they deserve. When we exceed this limit—when life becomes "too good"—our subconscious kicks in, creating fear, doubt, or self-sabotaging behaviors to bring us back to our perceived comfort zone.
Examples of the Upper Limit Problem:
Self-Sabotage: Picking a fight with a loved one after a major success or promotion.
Procrastination: Delaying progress on a big opportunity because of fear of failure—or success.
Negative Thoughts or Behaviors: Dwelling on small worries or creating unnecessary problems in the midst of a joyful period.
Physical Symptoms: Hendricks even describes how people may develop illnesses or injuries as a subconscious way to limit their growth or success.
The Upper Limit Problem stems from:
Fear of Outshining Others: Feeling guilty for surpassing family, friends, or colleagues.
Belief in Flaws: Thinking, I’m not worthy of this much success or love.
Old Conditioning: Internalizing messages from childhood about what’s "appropriate" to want or achieve.
Fear of the Unknown: Growth brings change, which can feel uncomfortable or threatening to our sense of stability.
Breaking Through the Upper Limit Problem
It is important to identify and challenge these limiting beliefs and fears. The key is to recognize when you’re hitting your "upper limit" and consciously choose to expand your capacity for happiness and success.
This involves:
Self-Awareness: Spotting when you’re self-sabotaging or creating problems unnecessarily.
Rewriting Limiting Beliefs: Affirming that you are worthy of sustained success, love, and joy.
Practicing Expansion: Leaning into the discomfort of growth rather than retreating.
The goal, as Hendricks explains, is to live in your "Zone of Genius," where you maximize your potential and thrive in alignment with your deepest passions and purpose. Recognizing and overcoming the Upper Limit Problem is a crucial step toward achieving that level of fulfillment.
Something that has worked really well for me is to practice feeling excited. Let little things make you excited. say “I am so excited” because even if it’s not true, your brain believes what you say. Tell yourself “I love this” learn how to emulate excitement in your body, let yourself feel happy, excitement, joy over every little thing
When you choose to cultivate a positive mental attitude, you’re not just improving your own experience—you’re creating a ripple effect that impacts everyone around you. Your mindset dictates your energy, and your energy is contagious. By aligning your thoughts with growth, positivity, and gratitude, you not only elevate your own life but inspire those around you to do the same.
It’s not about perfection. It’s about practice. Every moment is an opportunity to rewrite your narrative, embrace the present, and expand your capacity for joy. Choose wisely, and watch as your mindset transforms not just your inner world but the life you’re creating.
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